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WARNING! THIS IS NOT A SERIOUS POST, just ranting a lil about the game my way, I think that most of you will get what im trying to explain here)
Greetings folks! We are very excited to post our latest engineering report about C-Store Online here in order to reach more players, and maybe even entice them to try our game. (We heard there is a sarcastic idiot named Krelian here(ya thats me), maybe EVEN he will join our store,,,,,I mean our game!!
Well, here it goes!
-Pimp your face! New pimple option during character creation process: in C-store.
-New C-store update! The user interface for C-Store has been brought up to date FOR FREE!
-New open version of C-store jupiter jackets: in C-store
-Future episode Rerun Rerun: ''Not So Cloaked Intentions; The Ripping of Customers''.
-New C-store item; Tribble of the ''J'naii'' (From TNG Season 5 / Outcast). Petting this cute little tribble companion will take away all your worries..... as well as your man/womanhood, making you an awesome genderless species just like the ''J'naii'' themselves!
-Episode Rerun-Rerun-RERERUN of the above mentioned episode rerun rerun, this time futuring the gender naturalising tribble for free for all the ... umm all the players who complete it! For your convenience, once you complete this episode, the tribble will be teleported directly to your characters hands!
-NEW serum of ''Quantum Changing Back'' in C-STORE! Accidently finished the rerererererun of the ''Not So Cloaked Intentions; The Ripping of Customers'' And You wanna change back? Just purchase the serum of ''Changing back'' in C-Store or spend 90 trillion emblems in-game and you'll be right back to your old self! (Psst, was gonna insert a political joke here, but that would just get our whole post deleted, so.....)
-Some bug fixes somewhere along the line.............................maybe.
-Rebecca Black Sountrack Update! Now you can listen to the awesome humming voice of miss Black as you listen to her song; ''Star Day'' as you pretend to explore new frontiers (by shooting the crap out of everything!)
Gotta shoot things on Star Day!
Everybody loves C-store on the week-ends, week-ends!
etc yada yada......
-Season 5 Forum rule updates! (OPS! We say season 5, but its actually already here thanks to the efforts of our valiant moderators!! )As you all know, we made a news post about a company that has bought our C-Store after Atari bailed out on us. The news post was stationed somewhere that is a little hard to find on our forums, AND whenever people made new posts about the issue, we simply locked them up and told them to post on the thread we ourselves provided.(Well, guess what? We are STILL NOT accepting any posts about the issue, BUT WE ALSO HAVE DELETED THE NEWS POST THREAD THAT WE CREATED FOR YOU OURSELVES. So basically: It means that we will not allow you to post your opinions EVEN IF your opinions are respectful of other races/cultures and follow forum guidelines. Since we want to prevent you from spreading the word that you are not happy with C-sore's purchase by a different company, we will simply force you to shut-up on our forums in order to have it our way. Oh, and one more thing! IF anybody asks us why we did it? We will pretend and say we delete these posts for breaking the rules.... like perhaps for talking about different countries etc-what have you, ALAS, IN THE END, we all know the thruth: We force you to be quiet if we dont like what you say about our game. (And by game, we mean C-Store, ofcourse)
Well, that is it for now folks! Stay tuned for more updates, or even better; why dont you contribute yourself as players and help us post further news here?