dude i got a 7 month old and a wife wont play mmropgs euther same as ay back when we go n64 she doenst understand hobbies. my advice just deal with gotta make things work just how it goes.
My wife and I game together and it works out rather well. On top of that I have a high stress job and being able to escape into a game, yet keep relations with my spouse, makes mmorpgs that much more enjoyable.
My advice is to not get involved with another person unless they are a good match. If you like Star Wars and Star Trek and they hate Sci-fi that's a clue you are probably not dating the right person for you. If you like computers and console gaming but they think those are childish and wastes of time, it is probably not the wisest choice for you to marry that person.
Keep your eyes open and you will find the right spouse. As for those of you who are already hitched in a marriage where your wife doesn't like you gaming and/or playing mmorpgs...I pity you. You have a long hard road. I wish you the best.
Originally posted by LordMiz Is it just me, or is it that no1 who doesnt play doesnt understand?? If my wife tells me it's "just a game" one more time....your gonna read about me in the papers...... I know it's just a game, but it's also an escape sometimes, or a place to go hang out and play with your friends, where all your worried about is if your group healer is doing his job. i'm so sick of her, my bro's, any1, tellin me how unimportant the games are, like when they want something your supposed to drop w/e your doin in game, even tho u have 7 others relyin on you cuz your the only tank in the group, and how bad it makes u look when u leave them hangin on a seconds notice. i meet people that have their wives, g/f's etc playin with them, and it sux knowin my wife would never even in a million years think of playin any game..... so whats my options, deal with the hassle 24/7, or start lookin for a fellow gamer chick and divorce this nightmare.......
LMAO - you think this game is bad... If you played everquest you'd prolly already be divorced. In fact I used to game with a guy who got a divorce due to not paying attention to his wife and kid!! yeah that's right .. AND KID!!!!!!!!! Needless to say in my eyes this guy is a waste of life, if you have kids you better either get them involved with the game too or just quit playing. If your wife is hot send her my way and you just game on!!
Well as you all can see from my profile, i've taken some time away from the games to see if wifey can find something new to whine about. actually had a few civil conversations about the games now that i'm not playin, and her stance is firm......"it's just a game". ya i know its just a game sweetheart, but its something i enjoy doin, kinda like how you enjoy shoppin, i enjoy gaming.
bottom line.......if they dont play a mmorpg, they dont understand.
Ok well I played COH and EQ and now EQ2 I play quite alot. I am only a senior in High school have a job and a gf now for 2 years and I see how you feel. I go to school then go straight to work com home at 12 want to play my game for and hour or 2 but nooo the woman tells me she wants me to call her or she bitches. Then the day im finally off I think o I can play some no she wants me to do this with her and this and this and they get mad if you dont want to for one day of the week. But they have nothing to do during the week so when you play a game for 3 hours maybe and thinks its a waste of time and blah blah well watching a movie is a waste of time its the same thing!!! talking on the phone is a waste of time but they seem not to think so. Dont know if that makes since but I know its very frustrating
Originally posted by Dyrtt lol, My wife is the same way. I've tried for years to get her to play games with me, all to no avail. The wierd thing is, if we go somewhere that has a ms pacman or galaga machine she will play that for hours. Fortunatly, she has accepted that I'm not going to get up at a moments notice while I'm playing unless the house is on fire or something. It's all about boundries, ground rules, and compromise; she doesn't come bother me while I'm playing a game, I don't bother her while shes cleaning house, cooking my dinner, or crappin' out babies. Everyone wins!
Originally posted by Sanctus_Mors I've always told my wife that if I get to the point that I'm ignoring her requests, ignoring her, and my personal hygene is going south; She can unplug my computer I have no say in the matter. Course, even though she doesn't play MMO, she likes to watch me play. I've counted a couple of times where she just sat on my lap and said "it's my time" and I log off She's yet to pull the plug on my computer
Originally posted by shadowrunner Well, I have 2 examples that may be of interest. 1) By bestest online gaming buddy was married, and I was not. His wife would play the online games now and again, which was really cool, we were into fps games at the time. We all were on Roger Wilco, or BattleCom, and had fun. She then faded away from the gaming online, and we moved along to mmorpg's. When we got online to play together, it was because he cleared some time to do that, and she went off to do stuff with her friends. They made their time to be together, and they made the time to do things with their friends apart. Of course when they had their baby, there were times when he'd have to take care of the kid while she was at work, so once in awhile we'd have to pause when the kid woke up, or needed changing etc. And there were a few times when he'd tell me his wife was pestering him, wouldn't leave him alone, what he meant was, she was teasing him, cuddling him, kissing etc, so he took his leave for 20-30 mins, and would be back once he 'took care of her'..... So his situation, he set aside time to play, and she generally did her own thing at the same time. My personal situation: I was a hardcore gamer, wasn't married, played ALL the time. I had hooked up with a guy and we pretty much started the DJ'ing live while inside a mmorpg thing, so I was online ALWAYS when I got home from work. If I wasn't broadcasting, I'd be at one of the DJ's shows in game, or party, or leveling or playing the game. I pretty much lived in the game, and Real Life (tm) was just the pain in the ass that wouldn't let me be in the game all the time. Well, lo and behold, I met a woman, we got together, and I pretty much abandoned my online gaming for almost a year. This was partially due to the fact that she had a husband leave her to be with a girl he met online, and she had some issues with that, and also because the role playing we did was much nicer than any gaming role playing . We've been together almost 3 years now, and I have got back into gaming. She does not, and sees no sense in it, but she knows I get enjoyment from it. I do my gaming in the evenings, only after we've spent our time together, and she goes off to fall asleep to her Law & Order SVU tapes/dvds. So as long as I don't hook up with any chicks online, she knows it's not really such a bad thing. It's better than bein off at a bar or out in the streets. She trips out watchin me play sometimes, and was there when I checked out Sociolotron. She didn't seem to have a problem with it, even though thats basically a game that the object is to have sex with as many people as possible..... but I do have a problem with that. Even tho it's online and virtual, I still consider it cheating on her, so I only played that a few days and quit it. So I guess it comes down to how much you respect and love each other, and play the game(s) in your spare time, and spend time with her so she doesn't feel neglected. Other choice, get divorced and you can play all ya want.
very cool story..and congratz on finding a girl gamer boy
Totally get your point. But at the same time, when humans are on their deathbeds, how many awards, or diplomas, or job status, or level in a game will not matter. What will matter is how many friends or familly member are around you at that point.
Originally posted by Boldgrim Totally get your point. But at the same time, when humans are on their deathbeds, how many awards, or diplomas, or job status, or level in a game will not matter. What will matter is how many friends or familly member are around you at that point.
Couldn't have said it better myself, plus that no game is worth wrecking your social life over. If you find yourself playing a game too much, just unplug the comp or game consule and go out and ejoy life for a bit. Then return to the game when you get stressfull or just want a break from the everyday.
My wife loves this game. I don't really play much since I'm into DAoC. I've cancelled, though. Might start playing again if its not too hard to find groups.
funny how chit works out. i havent played a game in over 3 months. and have been seperated from wifey for teh last 2 of them. lol
bein on my ass about the game was just an excuse to be miserable.
However, all is changed now, im startin to get the itch about my lvl 40 tanker on freedom........just....10....more....lvls!!
lol
but seriously, not enough days in a week to live here........
we get 3 months at a time with my daughter now, when my daughter goes with her mom next month, ill have a lil more time. but seriously, how can we be expected to live with only 24 hours in a day?
try sqeezin a 40 hr work week and then tryin to manage, dating, goin out to bars and clubs again, golf on the weekends, tryin to get the boat out as much as possible while the summer is still here. all while trying to spend as much time possible with my daughter b4 her mother gets her back for 3 months.
chit sux, i still get pc gamer every month, man i miss playin games. not enough days in a wekk atm tho. ill be back, for an hour here and there (cough)bullshit(cough).
My wife use to do this also. I sat her down and told her that while she was right that it was just a game, that the people I was playing with were real people. It's no different then if I was playing basketball with a group of people and just left everytime we played. I would be inconsiderate of their enjoyment, breaking my commitment to them and creating a reputation where they wouldn't want to play with me because I was unrealiable.
She seemed to be able to understand that and for the last few years she is perfectly willing to give me plenty of warning when she wants to do something.
As with everything, there is a possibility of getting addicted. We have all seen Alchaholics, gablers(gamblaholics?), people who are addicted to eating and there are even those that are addicted to sex . With everything there is a level. In everything we do there is a cost. If you work and come home and play all day, then go to bed alone and always complain that you are lonely, well take a look.
With everything you must prioritize. If gaming is more important than eating, sleeping, sex, personal hygene and a social life, then by all means play 24/7 (Sorta like the first lvl 50 in COH he did it in less than a week, playing 18 hours a day) If it is important to you, do it. If your wife is important, then dont get mad when she asks to spend time with you. If your job is important, then go to work. Prioritize
AmtMud (god I am old) Ultima Online Beta & gold Ragnarok Online Beta Earth and Beyond Beta Horizons Beta Tribes (was there ever a beta?) Americas Army Beta Dark Age of Camelot Beta & Gold City of Hero's Beta & Gold Guild Wars City of Villains Beta Looking for the next Beta!
this is easily the most misunderstood topic, i thought that fellow gamers woulda got my point for sure. instead im a no life having fool who hates his wife and neglects his family. unreal.
I understand what you are saying, you like to do things with your wife and kid, but there is times you wanna just be alone and not be botherd, and just play for while without your wife always annoying you. Alot of people dont understand that for gamers playing a game is a way to "get away" from RL, just the same as people go to bars, or watch tv or go on vacation. As long as it dosen't consume you life go ahead and play.
Games arent your life you know...I mean all I do in the morning is play for 3 or 4 hours and then later on in the night i play for 3 or 2 hours...people always take games like their your life and you need to take care of it...its just a game...its not like your going to die if you dont play it.
anyway summer is ending so im not going to play as much.
Looking back it's probably my own fault, starting a thread with this title can only lead to bad things. was just tired of being misunderstood, and thought i could find comfort in the arms of people that i thought might have had similar circumstances.
Originally posted by LordMiz Is it just me, or is it that no1 who doesnt play doesnt understand?? If my wife tells me it's "just a game" one more time....your gonna read about me in the papers...... I know it's just a game, but it's also an escape sometimes, or a place to go hang out and play with your friends, where all your worried about is if your group healer is doing his job. i'm so sick of her, my bro's, any1, tellin me how unimportant the games are, like when they want something your supposed to drop w/e your doin in game, even tho u have 7 others relyin on you cuz your the only tank in the group, and how bad it makes u look when u leave them hangin on a seconds notice. i meet people that have their wives, g/f's etc playin with them, and it sux knowin my wife would never even in a million years think of playin any game..... so whats my options, deal with the hassle 24/7, or start lookin for a fellow gamer chick and divorce this nightmare.......
Do what makes you happy bro, I look at it like this.. I think relationships are give and take, if your wife isnt willing to give a bit on your gamming time but just wants you to give all to here then its time to ride out.. I too wish I could find a girl that is into gamming, but sadly that will probably never happen. Maybe it could for you? Who knows all I know is that if I had someone constantly nagging at me 24/7 she would have to hit the road and I could careless what it is that im doing.. As long as im happy thats all that really matters.
------------------------------ You see, every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with their surrounding environment, but you humans do not. You spread to an area, and you multiply, and you multiply, until every natural resource is consumed. The only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet.-Mr.Smith
Comments
Hmm im thinking i see your point now.......im married with a kid as well and life can get hectic....a few moments to your self is valuable.
The choice of hobbies is what bothers her.I wonder how she would feel if you were just looking at porn in your spare time rather than gaming?
You could always be doing something worse:)
Want to ENJOY an mmo?
Dont start a guild and dont be a leader or volunteer to be coleader or captain.
Just play the damn game:)
Heck, even pornstar Krystal Steal is a self-confessed City of Heroes player/addict. That has to count for something...heh.
Dont get married, dont reproduce and your life would be a lot better. The are 6 billion people in the world, dont make it any worse
.
My wife and I game together and it works out rather well. On top of that I have a high stress job and being able to escape into a game, yet keep relations with my spouse, makes mmorpgs that much more enjoyable.
My advice is to not get involved with another person unless they are a good match. If you like Star Wars and Star Trek and they hate Sci-fi that's a clue you are probably not dating the right person for you. If you like computers and console gaming but they think those are childish and wastes of time, it is probably not the wisest choice for you to marry that person.
Keep your eyes open and you will find the right spouse. As for those of you who are already hitched in a marriage where your wife doesn't like you gaming and/or playing mmorpgs...I pity you. You have a long hard road. I wish you the best.
LMAO - you think this game is bad... If you played everquest you'd prolly already be divorced. In fact I used to game with a guy who got a divorce due to not paying attention to his wife and kid!! yeah that's right .. AND KID!!!!!!!!! Needless to say in my eyes this guy is a waste of life, if you have kids you better either get them involved with the game too or just quit playing. If your wife is hot send her my way and you just game on!!
Well as you all can see from my profile, i've taken some time away from the games to see if wifey can find something new to whine about. actually had a few civil conversations about the games now that i'm not playin, and her stance is firm......"it's just a game". ya i know its just a game sweetheart, but its something i enjoy doin, kinda like how you enjoy shoppin, i enjoy gaming.
bottom line.......if they dont play a mmorpg, they dont understand.
Ok well I played COH and EQ and now EQ2 I play quite alot. I am only a senior in High school have a job and a gf now for 2 years and I see how you feel. I go to school then go straight to work com home at 12 want to play my game for and hour or 2 but nooo the woman tells me she wants me to call her or she bitches. Then the day im finally off I think o I can play some no she wants me to do this with her and this and this and they get mad if you dont want to for one day of the week. But they have nothing to do during the week so when you play a game for 3 hours maybe and thinks its a waste of time and blah blah well watching a movie is a waste of time its the same thing!!! talking on the phone is a waste of time but they seem not to think so. Dont know if that makes since but I know its very frustrating
Playing with your wife/girlfriend in an MMO would be nice. Always got some one fun to play with
If it's got blood, I can kill it.
funny how chit works out. i havent played a game in over 3 months. and have been seperated from wifey for teh last 2 of them. lol
bein on my ass about the game was just an excuse to be miserable.
However, all is changed now, im startin to get the itch about my lvl 40 tanker on freedom........just....10....more....lvls!!
lol
but seriously, not enough days in a week to live here........
we get 3 months at a time with my daughter now, when my daughter goes with her mom next month, ill have a lil more time. but seriously, how can we be expected to live with only 24 hours in a day?
try sqeezin a 40 hr work week and then tryin to manage, dating, goin out to bars and clubs again, golf on the weekends, tryin to get the boat out as much as possible while the summer is still here. all while trying to spend as much time possible with my daughter b4 her mother gets her back for 3 months.
chit sux, i still get pc gamer every month, man i miss playin games. not enough days in a wekk atm tho. ill be back, for an hour here and there (cough)bullshit(cough).
for now tho, im off to the club
latez
Stop ressurecting old posts, :P
My wife use to do this also. I sat her down and told her that while she was right that it was just a game, that the people I was playing with were real people. It's no different then if I was playing basketball with a group of people and just left everytime we played. I would be inconsiderate of their enjoyment, breaking my commitment to them and creating a reputation where they wouldn't want to play with me because I was unrealiable.
She seemed to be able to understand that and for the last few years she is perfectly willing to give me plenty of warning when she wants to do something.
As with everything, there is a possibility of getting addicted. We have all seen Alchaholics, gablers(gamblaholics?), people who are addicted to eating and there are even those that are addicted to sex
. With everything there is a level. In everything we do there is a cost. If you work and come home and play all day, then go to bed alone and always complain that you are lonely, well take a look.
With everything you must prioritize. If gaming is more important than eating, sleeping, sex, personal hygene and a social life, then by all means play 24/7 (Sorta like the first lvl 50 in COH he did it in less than a week, playing 18 hours a day) If it is important to you, do it. If your wife is important, then dont get mad when she asks to spend time with you. If your job is important, then go to work. Prioritize
AmtMud (god I am old)
Ultima Online Beta & gold
Ragnarok Online Beta
Earth and Beyond Beta
Horizons Beta
Tribes (was there ever a beta?)
Americas Army Beta
Dark Age of Camelot Beta & Gold
City of Hero's Beta & Gold
Guild Wars
City of Villains Beta
Looking for the next Beta!
this is easily the most misunderstood topic, i thought that fellow gamers woulda got my point for sure. instead im a no life having fool who hates his wife and neglects his family. unreal.
marriage - 5 years
ugly divorce battle - 10-15k
3 yr old girl - joy of my life
Having 1 fellow gamer on my side - priceless
I understand what you are saying, you like to do things with your wife and kid, but there is times you wanna just be alone and not be botherd, and just play for while without your wife always annoying you. Alot of people dont understand that for gamers playing a game is a way to "get away" from RL, just the same as people go to bars, or watch tv or go on vacation. As long as it dosen't consume you life go ahead and play.
Games arent your life you know...I mean all I do in the morning is play for 3 or 4 hours and then later on in the night i play for 3 or 2 hours...people always take games like their your life and you need to take care of it...its just a game...its not like your going to die if you dont play it.
anyway summer is ending so im not going to play as much.
I just find it funny that playing games gets nailed.
What about these football/cricket nuts that live, breathe and eat football (I am an Australian). Or fishing or reading. The list goes on......
Its just a shame that the ol Gamer Geek is always the scumbag.
For the record.... I HATE football.
------------------------------
You see, every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with their surrounding environment, but you humans do not. You spread to an area, and you multiply, and you multiply, until every natural resource is consumed. The only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet.-Mr.Smith