Hack and Slash Away

WinnTech

“Welcome Heroes! Please step forward and grab your armor here, wands from here and swords are over there.”

Meek voice, “Uh…what if we don’t want a sword?”

“Whaa? You don’t want a…don’t want a sword? Well there are guns…you have to shoot them while standing still, but if the guy gets close you have to use a sword or something.”

Meek voice, “All you have are rifles…I don’t shoot rifles well…are there any pistols?”

“A pistol!? A PISTOL? Kid, go play Tabula Rasa, stop wasting my time.”

 

Hack and slash…so much hack and slash. I used to love it, I used to envision myself up with the elites cutting down the “vile and despicable” with the rest of the elites. MMOs are good at that if done well. You will feel like you are Bigbunz or Ivannapwnu running about with your drastically oversized sword that obviously should cleave an enemy in two with one fell swoop.

 

I have played…well...way too many MMOs in my time; but, every now and then I drop out for a while and jump back in a good FPS. After beating it a few times, I jump back to MMOs. There is something missing when I do. That thunderous rhythmic thud of that gun going off as I back pedal or strategically place a shot to a leg to slow the beastie down that wants to have my entrails to make bratwurst…or worse. I see so many games in the market and good percentages are focused on the venerable hack and slash mentality.

 

There are a few exceptions that have variable successes, for instance, the before mentioned Tabula Rasa. Creative, yes, fun, somewhat, implemented well…that is up for grabs, IMO, it could have been better. But all the thoughts of TR are long gone as is the game itself and all of it’s PVE goodness. Now we have Global Agenda which, I will admit, is a good game but with repetition being a major factor of boredom I find myself loathe to double click the link on my desktop. Sure, it has some PVE just not much. The desert was nice, the missions, interesting, but it was only enough to wet the whistle. Not only that, but I am not a person that likes being stuck to a class, I prefer classless with no limitations and many, many, oh so insanely many weapons at my disposal.

 

Why…why are we still in hack and slash? I love sci-fi MMOs, I will try them as they come out. I have been severely disappointed at times by donning a giant robotic shell and being given a sword. Ok…if I had a giant robot, I would darn sure NOT give it a shiny sword to go maim other robots with. Not cool, not at all. Hack and slash is out dated. I know there are many that will see that and scoff. Well, scoff away, I will reiterate, hack and slash is out dated. Only method that would appease me in Oblivion Online, but, I usually play a cloth wearing rogue with really good bow skills and sneak. A well placed arrow takes down almost anything and the best part was that I had to aim it. Forget this auto targeting, I used a forgotten thing called skill. I am hoping that the gaming industry will soon realize that the whole game world needs to catch up with the times. There are games that you can fly on blimps and bombers (Yes…you WoW) but pistols seemingly don’t exist and you cannot shoot or cast on the run. A headache of frustration looms in my future. I hope that the future of MMOs continues to look up and out away from the traditional auto targeting, class based, class limiting, hack and slash drudgery that it has become. As I sit here in the beginning of a new day I hope for new horizons to appear and also for a miracle (JGE with a release date that actually sticks). Till then, I will just sit back and shake my head at the many clown faces of hack and slash. In the words of the only funny clown “Homey don’t play dat”.