My Chimp Is Smarter Than Your Honors Student...

8hammer8

You can almost hear Charleton Heston screaming: "Those damn dirty apes!!"

Well in this case, the primates in question are chimp's and not apes...Maybe this is how all the gold sellers for WoW and others in China make so much money...they just train the chimps to remember the best spots and hit the same 3 attack keys and voila....and money making monkey!!

Young chimp beats college students

Excerpt:

Japanese researchers pitted young chimps against human adults in two tests of short-term memory, and overall, the chimps won.

That challenges the belief of many people, including many scientists, that "humans are superior to chimpanzees in all cognitive functions," said researcher Tetsuro Matsuzawa of Kyoto University.

"No one can imagine that chimpanzees — young chimpanzees at the age of 5 — have a better performance in a memory task than humans," he said in a statement.

 

 

CleffyII

And in tests of complex math formulas, the chimps threw shit at the test administrator.

Tuor7

So, under highly controlled and vetted conditions, a Chimp has better short-term memory than a human. Wow. Fascinating.

</sarcasm>

llhockley

That is strangely nice to hear.

The human race can be incredibly arrogant sometimes.

Tuor7

Rainman vs. The Chimp.

Rainman wins!

Rikimaru_X

I'm sure the chimps wouldn't have a problem, but don't we have so much on our minds that it just cancles us out or somthin?

Arndur

As far as pure brain power goes there is nothing that will ever come close to a humans brains heres this.

A computer might think on this lvl.

-----------------

A brain would be.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------... and so on you get the picture.

Sadly most humans only can use 2% of the brain consisencely and genius might use 3%. If we could squeak out just another few % the human race would just propel though technogly and ideas way faster then the last 50 years.

Briansho

Originally posted by CleffyII


And in tests of complex math formulas, the chimps threw shit at the test administrator.

E = m * turd ^ 2

Godliest

Oh shit! They finally understood why I'm so good in school...

8hammer8

 

Originally posted by Nasica


"The two of the three smartest species on the earth was man and the dolphin. Man though he was the smartest species on the planet because man has created TV, war and New York City. The dolphins thought they were the smartest species on the planet for precisely the same reason"

close...and a lot better than I could do of the top of my head for such a long quote:

 

"For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man - for precisely the same reasons"

I absolutely loved the preface and it ties in nicely to this thread:

"Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the Western Spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun.  Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-eight million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue-green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea.

This planet has—or rather had—a problem, which was this: most of the people on it were unhappy for pretty much of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movements of small green pieces of paper, which is odd because on the whole it wasn't the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.

And so the problem remained; lots of the people were mean, and most of them were miserable, even the ones with digital watches.

Many were increasingly of the opinion that they'd all made a big mistake in coming down from the trees in the first place. And some said that even the trees had been a bad move, and that no one should ever have left the oceans.

And then, one Thursday, nearly two thousand years after one man had been nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be to be nice to people for a change, a girl sitting on her own in a small café in Rickmansworth suddenly realized what it was that had been going wrong all this time, and she finally knew how the world could be made a good and happy place. This time it was right, it would work, and no one would have to get nailed to anything.

Sadly, however, before she could get to a phone to tell anyone about it, a terrible, stupid catastrophe occurred, and the idea was lost forever.

This is not her story."