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What would YOU do?
Deylana
Member Posts: 2
Hi Everyone,
I just have this quick question : Would you play/join a guild/group/party with someone if you found out the player worked as a stripper in real life?
The reason I ask this is because of a situation I find myself in. I am in a guild which I was told is comprised only of adults. About a week ago, I took my laptop to work with me so I could play at work. In guild chat, I mentioned that I was playing at work and how I loved being able to do that. I was warned by other guild members to not get myself into trouble in my real life just because I'm a dedicated gamer. In reply, I told them I would not get in any trouble because I work as a stripper so I can do what I want, as long as I don't miss my show when I am called to stage. Ever since then, I have not heard ONE WORD from my fellow guild members. I have logged on and seen others were online and said 'hi', and asked my guild's healer a question and I have gotten no reply. I don't know if this is coincidence, or if this is intentional ignoring and I should leave the guild. Since I haven't heard anything, I don't know how to interpret this. I would like to hear other people's thoughts so I can best evaluate the situation and make a decision on what to do.
Thanks so much in advance for sharing your thoughts with me!
Comments
I have no issue, live and let live is my motto. When you're online in a game, you're assuming a bit of an "online" ego. So long as the person behind the keyboard is a nice person, that's all that should matter.
It's a shame a job like that is seen as a negative thing but gamers can be fickle I guess. If you're struggling with the outcome, maybe look at it as a learning lesson (an unfortunate one that shouldn't exist). Perhaps it's wise not to share what you do for a living unless absolute certain a closed group of people are going to respect it.
I suppose it could be coincidence but only you can know that.
To give you some insight on the nature of a lot of people: A lot of the time we are judged and also judge others on their chosen profession,. It's human nature to do this. Someone who sells sex toys and earns $3 million a year would be seen badly whereas a surgeon who works for $250k would be seen as an angel.
"True friends stab you in the front." | Oscar Wilde
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Just trying to live long enough to play a new, released MMORPG, playing New Worlds atm
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"This is the most intelligent, well qualified and articulate response to a post I have ever seen on these forums. It's a shame most people here won't have the attention span to read past the second line." - Anon
To answer your question. Yes I would join a party and/or guild if I knew there was a stripper or strippers as members. Who gives a shit? If that guild is treating you like that then just find another guild. Screw them. Oh and by the way, pics or it didn't happen. :P
You can't possibly be that naive, can you?
--John Ruskin
I wouldn't have any problem whatsoever. I know people from all walks of life. If anything, I'd want to group with you more simply because you're probably quite cool. Would other people have issues? Sure, but who cares. It's your life. If your guild has snubbed you, find a new one, or form your own where you can control membership.
I personally don't care what you do as long as you are doing it for reasons you deem good and if it is something you want to be doing. Heck, even then I wouldn't care as long as you were satisfied.
You want to be a stripper? fine by me. You want to be a prostitute (different from a stripper but just an example) that is fine by me as well as long as you realize that can be dangerous.
you want to be a lawyer? sure fine. A nude model, a maker of pornographic movies, a greeting card writer, a janitor, a sanitation worker, a physicist, all fine by me.
Don't mind other people, Sometimes they have a definite idea of who they are and what they are about and when they meet other people who tacitly challenge their identity they can sometimes freak out and retreat. Or lash out.
Honestly, I would find a guild with people who don't care what you do. Or, maybe there is a lesson there and realize that not everyone can handle such things and sometimes it's better to just keep that to yourself and people who are close to you.
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It's been in every strip club I've been to in FL and GA. I don't see why that's so unusual.
There isn't a "right" or "wrong" way to play, if you want to use a screwdriver to put nails into wood, have at it, simply don't complain when the guy next to you with the hammer is doing it much better and easier. - Allein
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Hi Everyone,
Thank you for all of your feedback! I just want reply to questions and comments first :
1) we DO have wifi, but it's for management use only. I connect at work by using my cell phone as a mobile hotspot.
2) It's not my first time on this site, but I've been lurking as a guest. I had this question and I thought this would be a good place to ask it, so I finally signed up.
3) As for me, I think a person's real life character comes out in online gaming. If one is a team player offline, I think that comes out in the way they play. Same for if they are selfish or lazy. To that extent, I DO care about what one does offline...but that doesn't mean their occupation per se.
I wish I could tell you that the stripper stereotype of the shallow, materialistic, catty, not-too-bright and immature girl who will do anything for a buck was completely unfounded, but I have had the misfortune of working with women who fit that stereotype to the tee. I didn't like working with them and I certainly wouldn't want to play MMO's with them. So, I could understand people being leery about me IF MY JOB IS THE ONLY THING THEY KNOW ABOUT ME, and haven't seen me play. My guild has seen how I play though, so IMO it should be a non-issue
UPDATE :
I logged in a few minutes ago and got a chance to speak with the GM. He told me he just hadn't been able to be online much lately. He knows the guild's healer personally, so he was able to explain to me that she had been ignoring guild chat because the newest guild member had been spamming her constantly for stat buffs and it was annoying her, that it had nothing to do with me. The other guild members told me that they had been afk a lot while logged the past few days (they have kids to attend to) so they were not intentionally ignoring me. The GM then helped me with quest I had trouble with. So, everything has been clarified and turns out there is no problem.
Thanks again for all the replies!
Pics or shenanigans :P
Seriously though, I think this might answer why you have been getting the cold shoulder.....
http://youtu.be/RhxOWekRGXI
Honestly though, a lot of guilds that bill themselves as "adult" have a lot of couples in them. And saying that you are a stripper out loud puts a strain on just about everyone.
The attention whore chicks are like "/hate"
The girls who are there only to keep an eye on their spouses, or who are in the early stages of their relationships and are still trying to prove to their spouses that they are cool are like "/hate"
Their creepy spouses and boyfriends are like "Gotta find a way to get dem pics!!" but they don't want to send you tells because they assume that everyone else is already sending you tells.
Their reasonable spouses are like "DOH! can't talk to her if I want to stay in the guild" so they don't talk to you at all.
The creepy in the other direction spouses are like "I don't need that anywhere near my wife" meanwhile they are slowly getting more frustrated with you because deep down inside, they want dem pics hahaha.
And the regular people.....oh wait. You said it was a guild in an MMORPG right?
Glad you worked it out. Next time though, can you delay letting us know just a little. I log on kinda late and it takes time to think up all of the stupid stuff I just said.
I don't know ... a stripper fine but a LAWYER ?? Sorry I got to put a line somewhere ...
I dont see the problem with playing online with a stripper. The problem is that you were unfortunate to be playing with narrowminded people. But its ok, you probably didnt know they were like that.
So, dont feel uncomfortable (although sometimes its inevitable, but youll learn to deal with the situation). The most infectious plague in society is brought by people who refuses to accept others the way they are and move on with their lives.
EDIT: Sovrath gave a pretty good advice as well about keeping it to yourself in some situations which is also part of what i just said.
I am glad everything works out.
On a more general note, i doubt most players would care if you are a stripper. In fact, more likely is that they are curious and want to chat with you more (particularly given the OTHER stereotype of gamers living in their parents' basement and have no chance to talk to girls).
yeah, the lawyer thing did make me "sick up" a little ...
Godfred's Tomb Trailer: https://youtu.be/-nsXGddj_4w
Original Skyrim: https://www.nexusmods.com/skyrim/mods/109547
Serph toze kindly has started a walk-through. https://youtu.be/UIelCK-lldo