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[Column] General: Human Nature

SBFordSBFord Associate Editor - News ManagerThe Land of AZPosts: 16,622MMORPG.COM Staff Uncommon

Whenever there's an ugly disagreement on the 'Net these days, people say it's because it's anonymous and it's the Internet. But is that the case or is it simply one's true colors shining through? Check out our latest thoughts about this issue and then leave yours in the comments.

The other day I was talking with a friend who is in a management position at his company. He's helped several of his friends get jobs and he's also established friends at the company in which he works. This probably sounds familiar to a lot of you. Well, despite being his friend, he's been backstabbed quite a few times by some of them. Some of them got others to bandwagon against him and the only thing that kept him afloat was the fact that there were still a few that wouldn't turn... plus he was good at his job.

Read more of Hillary Nicole's Pokket Says: Human Nature.

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Associate Editor: MMORPG.com
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Comments

  • apocolusterapocoluster newport news, VAPosts: 1,321Member Uncommon
       Moral of the story...dont guild  :)
     

    No matter how cynical you become, its never enough to keep up - Lily Tomlin

  • ScarfeScarfe londonPosts: 281Member

    On the internet you can talk and act in relative anonymity which leads to some excesses of behavour (I include myself in this with some of my more ill-thoughtout posts on mmorpg.com). 

    In a game just as in real life where a relationship has developed I think that most people simply want to avoid confrontation.  If, in there opinion, a 'white lie' such as the Japan codeword saves an argument then they will go with the lie.  Irritating, sure, but Machiavellian, no.   

    currently playing: DDO, AOC, WoT, P101

  • BTrayaLBTrayaL BucharestPosts: 595Member Uncommon

    One of the reasons I solo most of the time.

    Off topic, Pocket becomes (slowly but surely) a very good reason for me to even come to mmorpg.com.

    The forums are... what they are. Reviews are rarely something I can agree on (and not surprisingly, many readers with me). There is a critical need of good columns here, like Pocket's.

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  • SovrathSovrath Boston Area, MAPosts: 18,460Member Uncommon

    It's probably important to note that just because people are "nice" to you or polite doesn't mean they are your friends.

    the one thing I have seen a lot of all through my years in online games is that people are very fast to claim that "x" person is their riend. And then the drama happens.

    I've actually made decent friends in my online gaming time but these are people I have also ended up meeting in real life and still meet when they are in town.

    Treat everyone who treats you well as a good acquaintence until time proves otherwise. On either side of the equation.

     

  • freakkyfreakky Key Largo, FLPosts: 66Member Uncommon

    I rather be overly trusting and take the punishment then be in fear of being betrayed. I expect people back stab more online then real life. Online they can just move to another game if it doesn't work out in their favor but in real life moving is hole another ball game.

    I guess my hole thing with this is that it has become the norm to troll and rage online.  I rarely meet people that have self control and are just laid back. I play for fun, not to be stress out about people trying piss me off.  So /ignore is used very often for me these days.

    Also people love drama. Even passive a person like me. I like to hear about it at times but not be in it.

    Anyways best luck with your guild drama. Blue your my girl " old school movie" or How many smurfs did you have to kill to get it that color? Jokes people told me when I had blue hair lol. Was my favorite color though.

  • Threatlevel0Threatlevel0 Elizabethtown, KYPosts: 165Member
    When I was 19 I worked at a Walmart supercenter for a year.   That taught me all I needed to know about human nature.  
  • ScottgunScottgun Williamsville, NYPosts: 356Member
    Originally posted by freakky

    I rather be overly trusting and take the punishment then be in fear of being betrayed. I expect people back stab more online then real life. Online they can just move to another game if it doesn't work out in their favor but in real life moving is hole another ball game.

    I guess my hole thing with this is that it has become the norm to troll and rage online.  I rarely meet people that have self control and are just laid back. I play for fun, not to be stress out about people trying piss me off.  So /ignore is used very often for me these days.

    Ditto, but I'd say it depends on the game. Eve Online for instance is a veritable petri dish of "metagame" espionage, backstabbing, and sabotage, so I can hardly blame corp managers for having rigorous screening processes. Typical themepark stuff however I tend to be in it for the socialization and therefore don't invest so much in being uber that I need to watch my back.

    Now we're calling prostitutes "sex workers". What's next? Calling hit men "end-of-life technicians"?

  • IselinIselin Vancouver, BCPosts: 5,614Member Uncommon

    This article reminds me of the episode of "Community" when Greendale debates City College about whether human beings are good or evil... minus the obnoxious handicapped guy flying through the air :)

    It also reminds me of something I have firmly believed for a long time: never trust anyone who really, really wants to be in a position of authority. their motives are never pure (duh)  :) Dollars to doughnuts that the guild revolt and member poaching was orchestrated by players who were officers in the original guilds and that your average non-officer, generally helpful veteran members just carried on playing and being generally helpful veterans.

    You're describing hypercompetitive behavor that happens in the fast lane... the drivers in the slow lanes just watch and shake their heads in disbelief.

  • EladiEladi ArnhemPosts: 1,100Member Uncommon
    people/humans  are animals, we will never outgrow this behavior but unfortunate it seems we also do nothing to surpress the bad parts of our nature, we seem to embrace it more and more. in gaming i hate how some folks do anyting for the profit, mutch like RL the tought that greed is bad is gone.  I guess we all just have to wait again for the hard lessons that life always give us,  we are great at repeating history ... ..
  • ScarfeScarfe londonPosts: 281Member
    Originally posted by Eladi
    people/humans  are animals, we will never outgrow this behavior but unfortunate it seems we also do nothing to surpress the bad parts of our nature, we seem to embrace it more and more. in gaming i hate how some folks do anyting for the profit, mutch like RL the tought that greed is bad is gone.  I guess we all just have to wait again for the hard lessons that life always give us,  we are great at repeating history ... ..

    I don't know, you don't see most other pack animals screwing each other over for profit.  I think I might have stolen that line, more or less, from Aliens. 

    currently playing: DDO, AOC, WoT, P101

  • CorthalaCorthala LagosPosts: 283Member Uncommon

    I like MMO but I am tired of Guild drama, I seen so many fall, from AO to SWTOR.

    I seen I guild end because of some forum drama that end up in max exodus from our guild to other guilds.

    I seen a guild fall because the GM had to AFK from some time and some player use that as escuse to leave guild and join a raid guild(our was growing and almost raid ready).

    I had alot of bad experience with players and guilds. I like the social part of MMO's but I am tired of people behaivor.

    "you are like the world revenge on sarcasm, you know that?"

    One of those great lines from The Secret World

  • freakkyfreakky Key Largo, FLPosts: 66Member Uncommon
    Originally posted by Scarfe
    Originally posted by Eladi
    people/humans  are animals, we will never outgrow this behavior but unfortunate it seems we also do nothing to surpress the bad parts of our nature, we seem to embrace it more and more. in gaming i hate how some folks do anyting for the profit, mutch like RL the tought that greed is bad is gone.  I guess we all just have to wait again for the hard lessons that life always give us,  we are great at repeating history ... ..

    I don't know, you don't see most other pack animals screwing each other over for profit.  I think I might have stolen that line, more or less, from Aliens. 

    Animals do. lol mates and food.

  • SomeOldBlokeSomeOldBloke Lancaster, UKPosts: 2,141Member Uncommon
    Originally posted by apocoluster
       Moral of the story...dont guild  :)
     

    no, don't make friends.

  • BattlerockBattlerock Youngstown, OHPosts: 1,393Member
    Things like this have altered me psychologically. I used to be very compassionate , I used to be exciting and people used to like hanging out with me. I am just a shadow of my old self, my heart has turned black. I don't know how to handle it when someone's nice to me and heaven forbid I be nice to someone my wife would flip her wig. I just try to focus on other things rather than the stress related headaches, random chest pain, and thinking about what can I do about it. Incidents like those can really beat you down, and change your character. That's how you end up living without any fire and reading stupid books about happiness and why its a struggle to find it. That's also how you end up preaching about reducing your expectations, and that's also how you aquire the patience not to speak or act on impulse.
  • JerYnkFanJerYnkFan Kenilworth, NJPosts: 339Member Uncommon

    As the years have gone by I have come to realize the way humans interact really doesn't change much after high school.  It's the same BS in a different package.  The internet just changes the fact that you don't have to look the person in the face while being a total douche to them.

    On a side note, Pokket your articles have really come a long way since you first started in terms of depth and substance.  Kudos and keep up the good work.

  • mistmakermistmaker viennaPosts: 232Member Uncommon

    this thread is a little childish...

    welcome to the real world

  • CorthalaCorthala LagosPosts: 283Member Uncommon
    Originally posted by mistmaker

    this thread is a little childish...

    welcome to the real world

     

    Not childish, I just a good exemple of my some players that used to be social are getting tired of all the guild drama.

    "you are like the world revenge on sarcasm, you know that?"

    One of those great lines from The Secret World

  • erictlewiserictlewis Cottondale, ALPosts: 3,026Member Uncommon

    For starters. If your friend is hiring his friends at work this is bad practice. In fact the company that I work for would fire you if they though you offered a job to a personal friend. They have high standards, you have to pass math test, drug test, and a phyc eval, and a criminal background check as we have to be bonded.

    I can tell you that any human resource division at any reputable company will tell you that hiring family, and friends is a major no no. In fact we do have family members working but they were moved to different divisions and different bosses. All I can say is your friend needs to take some human resource training classes they are available from many different companies.

    Now that I talked about human resources as that was the first part of your post I will go into guild politics. I have the t-tshirt been there done that, it is an old story.

    I actually had an officer who formed another guild and was recruiting our best raiders. I only found out about it after we lost 5 of them. The 6th one said he you know blablabla he said this this and that. Needless to say I booting him, his alts, his wife her alts, and his brother and alts from the guild. Posted why in at our guild portal site. Needless to say this made him mad. I actually had him try to get me banned on this site after that lol, as every post I made for a while he posted on with some very nasty stuff.

    You just finally learn to grow a thick skin and move on.

  • GishgeronGishgeron Princeton, KYPosts: 1,287Member
    Originally posted by mistmaker

    this thread is a little childish...

    welcome to the real world

      How odd, you think that a person finding that sort of behavior disgusting to be childish.  The fact you've embraced that behavior is more childish than she was.  People like that suck, and wanting to be a better person than that is important.  The advancement mankind has had is entirely thanks to the few times we decided to work together toward the same goal, instead of against each other for our own selfish crap.  If hating this sort of thing is childish, then perhaps we all need to be a little more childish. 

      The world is a reflection of both what we are, and what we expect ourselves to be.  I say its high time we paid less attention to the former and focused more on the latter.

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  • RyowulfRyowulf Greensburg, PAPosts: 668Member Uncommon

    True Colors?  I am not sure there is a single absolute personally that people have. 

    If a guy throws himself on a grenade to save his friends, is he a hero? And yet that same guy cheats and lies and has stolen from his friends in the past.  Or the football star who uses woman and acts like he is better than everyone else, but donates large amount of cash and his time to charities without recognition. What are these people's True Color?

    I think people are complex and that how each of us perceives someone determines who we think that person is, but we shouldn't necessary believe what we see is all that there is to know about that person.

     

  • BlessingsBlessings Merritt Island, FLPosts: 66Member

    I don't think that the internet brings out the worst in people. I think for some its just the opposite. In real life I'm sarcastic, have a huge ego, and for lack of a better word at the moment, have an "alpha"-like attitude towards everyone around me.

     

    Online, people tell me I'm kind, talkative, helpful, and completely unlike myself in real life. (Those that know me irl and ingame) Half of my friends PREFER to talk to me ingame or on facebook, etc. because I'm less overbearing.

     

    Not sure why some people tend to get nastier online, but not everyone does. It would be interesting to see if anyone has done any kind of study on this behavior. Why do people like me tend to act nicer online, and some people get nastier?

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  • VolkanikVolkanik DOVERPosts: 8Member

    I think it would be possible to write an entire thesis on the psychology of internet based relationships between people.  From my own point of view, I try and keep my feet on the ground when it comes to people I interact with on line.  I always see them as "temporary" and am cautious in not investing too much time emotionally in them, either because they are equally capable of turning out to be back stabbing Judases, or that the game we're all playing suddenly gets shut down without warning.

     

  • LizardoneLizardone baltimore, MDPosts: 93Member
    Originally posted by apocoluster
       Moral of the story...dont guild  :)
     

     

    ^ this; less drama is always good

  • PhaserlightPhaserlight Boca Raton, FLPosts: 867Member Uncommon
    Reading this article revealed my human nature. Thanks for your writing; clear and concise. The internet is about a big a step forward as the telephone: people behave accordingly.

    "To be what you are not, experience what you are not." -Saint John of the Cross
    Authored 110 missions in Vendetta Online
    Check it out on Steam

  • KendaneKendane Las Cruces, NMPosts: 225Member

    I've been lucky and for the most part have done rather decently as far as guilds go. My worst bit being I usually cannot bring myself to log into an MMO anymore and sort of disappear. Still, humans can be scum online and offline as this post points out. There are some who're out for themselves, and will use whatever means to advance themselves. I've read stories where people are framed for crimes(such as having kiddy pron on their PC) that the person that put it on there "discovered" simply to get the promotion. I've seen guilds be torn apart because someone was reprimnded for breaking the guild rules and they pulled the guild apart for revenge. It's happened since EQ, where guilds that believed they say, "owned" Plane of Hate, would train and kill another guild "by accident" because they were stealing their "property".

    There are several sleezeballs, and these sleezeballs can and will take advantage and destroy really nice(though maybe native) people for their own gain or amusement. Most people are a mix of the two I would say, sometimes doing something selfish at the expense of others, sometimes doing something selfless just because.

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