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Last night your King was inclined to write down a list of the constants of the world. This list was posted in the form of my very own myspace blog...now, of course, your King has many endevours and property rights...Myspace is simply one among many outlets for your king to express his Kingly goodness. These are the constants of my Kingdom, they are the laws that govern our very existence...learn them, cherish the teachings, and never forget what you hath learned on this blessed day.
1: When driving in California, when one sees a CalTrans truck, there will ALWAYS be at least three guys standing around, and there will always be a maximum of one person doing any kind of legitimate work. If there are more than four people present, the ratio will stay at 3:1 for lazy jerks and workers respectively. The King despises these supposed servants of the City. If these men were on the King's payroll, they would all be fired immediately.
2: Skinny people will always find reasons to mock people who are bigger than them. If the skinny person sees a fat person, they will make fun of them for being fat. If the person in question is actually muscular, they will instead call them "flabby" because afterall, the skinny person is way more cut, nevermind that they couldn't curl a miserable 10 pounds. This leads me to establish a new Kingly decree...I am henceforth placing a ban on annoying skinny people. Those who wish to do so, may remain skinny, however if the King declares you to be both annoying and skinny, you will be flogged until you annoy me less.
3: Women will always comment on other women who they think have breast implants. The women who comment on this will always qualify their observation with "Oh I don't care...I'm just pointing it out" BULLCRAP...The women who make these comments are simply trying to get any man who is present to make a negative comment about the owner of the implant's breasts, thus making the commenting woman feel better about her own body. The King is completely apathetic to breast implants. Unlike these women who feel so inclined to make comments, clearly their jealousy and self confidence is affected by the sight of such ample bosoms! But the King says "let them have boobs!" And the King's word is final.
4: If you go to the YMCA, no matter what day it is, no matter what time of the day it is, no matter what time of the year it is, there will always be old fat men showering naked. Sometimes you can return two hours later and the same old fat men will still be in there, naked and showering...showering and naked. This is my Kingly decree! All fat old men who go to the YMCA must take their showers in the stalls that have curtains!! The King does not enjoy the sight of saggy man butt!!
5: Every single time somebody sings Eric Clapton's song "If I saw you in Heaven" a woman nearby will hear him and say something to the effect of "oh that song is so sad" In fact, all woman readers thought to themselves "aww that song is so sad" when they read the title of the song. They will generally follow up their comment about the song, with a question as to whether or not the person who was singing it knows what the song was written about. The king has no new decree for this constant, for the King enjoys the sentimental side of women, and therefore this constant may remain in place.
6: When paying a toll at a bridge, the person paying will always be inclined to say "thank you" to the person operating the toll booth. This is, of course, illogical, as you are handing them money for using something that your tax dollars paid for in the first place, if anything, they should be handing you a bucket of money every time you use the bridge. Why? Reparations! NEW LAW: No more tolls!! instead of tolls, the government shall use money responsibly so that the subjects of the King shall not be punished with $4 toll every time they use a bridge that they paid for in the first place!
7: Asian women can't drive...that's really all there is to say about that one....Kingly decree: The king does not wish to be banned...let's leave it at that.
8: People with more than one or two bumper stickers on their cars usually suck at life. They are usually either very strange, or very annoying, or a combination of the two. Especially those people with the entire backside of their car covered in political bumper stickers, stay away from those people. Therefore the King must create a new law: Weird people may have all the bumper stickers that they wish for...however they will not be entitled to any social niceties, as the rest of the King's subjects are. They will be known as weird people and shall be treated as such!! Any weird bumper sticker loving freak that objects will be flogged!
9: People who still like the Simpsons are some of the most aggressive fans of any show that you will ever meet. Though some of them will tell you that they did enjoy futurama more, they will still contend that the Simpsons is still the most poignient and insightful cartoon on television today. Any mention of Family Guy around these rabid fanboys will get you yelled at. Simpson's fans may continue to love their show, however they will respect those of us who enjoy things that are actually FUNNY! THE KING HATH SPOKEN
10: People who LARP...lol...sorry I can't...it's too easy to pick on LARP'ers. If you don't know what LARP'ing is...google it, you'll laugh...or cry...either way you'll see why it's just too damn easy...The King demands that LARP'ers cease all LARP'ing until they realize that it will get them made fun of by those of us who are just not that damn dorky! When they realize this, they are free to LARP to their heart's content!
THE KING HATH SPOKEN!!!
Your argument is like a two legged dog with an eating disorder...weak and unbalanced.